Make That Lovie Funky

Lest you were concerned that I've gone 'round the bend on this James Brown business ... I'm referring to a different kind of funk. Smell. And a different kind of lovie: a Security Object, like a blanket or "taggie". Familiar caregiver smells are a potent releaser of oxytocin, the "bonding" and security hormone. You can use this to your family's advantage ...

Make your child's security object, lovie, or blankie smelly in a good way by using it during feedings. Having it close to your body can let it absorb both your own good funk and the smell of breastmilk or formula. If one parent tends to feed more often, another caregiver can use the lovie to evoke a happy-well-fed feeling when rocking and consoling the child later. That lovie can be a real help with bedtimes and daycare transitions too. Just make sure to invest in identical backup lovies if possible, and rotate them to keep them all equally funky. Wash infrequently, if at all.

Greet Your Kids "On the Good Foot"

Here's a nice tip from Deborah Gray, not to mention James Brown. Like the hardest working man in show business, start your interactions on the "downbeat" ...

When you greet your kids in the morning, or in the middle of the night, or are walking into a sibling melee, try talking to them on the exhale, rather than in a tense inhale, or held breath. Try it - take a deep breath (or 2 or 3), let your shoulders melt, and greet them on the exhale. Calm is contagious.